The word ‘relationships’ refers to social connections, where two or more individuals interact, meet, care for each other, think about each other, help each other, and try to understand each other better. This is the identity of every positive relationship. A relationship is basically a connection or bond between people, which can be of different types and levels, such as acquaintances, friends, family members, or romantic partners. The closer the relationship, the more emotionally vulnerable it is, as there are no boundaries or limits.
In reality, no relationship can survive with one-sided effort, just like a car cannot run on one wheel. It’s impossible for a relationship to work if only one person is putting in the effort. The renowned author, Stephen R. Covey, In his famous book ‘The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People’, says that the foundation of any relationship should be based on a ‘win-win’ condition, where both parties play a 50-50 role. This means that both parties should have an interdependent relationship, where they both contribute equally and support each other.
In the case of parents and children, this relationship is also a type of connection, where both parties have their own roles to play. Ideally, parents should play a 50% role, and children should play a 50% role. However, research has shown that parents often take on more than 50% of the responsibilities, while children may not contribute as much. This can lead to an imbalance in the relationship, where children may not develop a sense of responsibility or accountability.
The main reason for this imbalance is the overindulgence of parents, who often prioritize their children’s happiness and well-being over their own needs. This can lead to a lack of boundaries and discipline in the relationship, making it difficult for children to develop emotional intelligence and resilience. The concept of ‘merit’ is often used in organizations to evaluate an individual’s performance and potential. However, in family me relationships, merit is often overlooked, and parents may prioritize their children’s happiness over their own needs.
Parents work hard to provide for their children’s comfort and well-being, often sacrificing their own needs and desires. However, children may not always appreciate the efforts their parents make for them, which can lead to a sense of entitlement and a lack of gratitude. This can ultimately lead to a ‘win-lose’ situation, where one party is shouldering all the responsibilities, while the other party is not contributing equally.
Furthermore, research has shown that when parents prioritize their children’s material comfort over their emotional and psychological well-being, it can lead to negative consequences, such as mental health issues and emotional disturbances. Therefore, it’s essential for parents to strike a balance between providing for their children’s needs and teaching them important life skills, such as responsibility, accountability, and emotional intelligence. In reality, children’s upbringing and personal grooming play a significant role In their mental health and well-being.
If parents do not pay attention to their children’s emotional and psychological needs, it can lead to problems such as depression, social disinhibition disorder, and drug abuse. Family members, especially parents, should try to bridge the communication gap and connect with each other. They should also strengthen their bond and expect their children to respect and obey them. An interdependent relationship should be established, where both parties contribute equally and support each other.
Willing Ways Karachi Nazimabad the rehabilitation center for drug addiction and other mental illness provides treatment for mental health issues, including counseling sessions for patients and their families. The goal is to help patients and families develop healthy, wealthy, and wise relationships, where they can support each other and work together to overcome challenges.
Nazia Nizar Ali
Psychologist
Willing ways Nazimabad