A relationship in which a person is controlled by another, who is constantly promoting pathological conditions, it refers to the one who wants to command over other submissive people
By: Merriam Webster Dictionary
Co-dependence movement in Arizona in the mid-’80s. Co-Dependents Anonymous had its first meeting in October of 1986 and reading material on Co-dependence as a disease. These Co-dependence books were the next generation evolved from the books on the Adult Child Syndrome of the early ’80s.
In Clark & Stoffel’s 1992, research article entitled: “Assessment of Co-dependency Behavior in Two Health Student Groups”, they described: “A painful dependence which includes: compulsive behaviors, forceful approvals, destruction of self-worth and identity”.
An extreme control on others personal life, taking charge of others wellbeing will shatter the individuality of one person, it lowers the self-esteem, self-concept, and increases external locus of control. Codependent behaviors are self-destructive.
Decide what you are selfish or selfless
Do not get lost in the age of Me, Me, Me
According to Melody Beattie’s book Codependent No More (1986):
Codependency harms a person in many ways: disturbance of moods, emotions, feelings, thoughts, behaviors, it is a paradoxical dependency.
Scott Welzelt from Albert Einstein College of Medicine said that: “Codependent relationships signify a degree of unhealthy bonding, where one person doesn’t have self-efficacy or autonomy”.
- Develop functional hobbies
- Distance yourself
- Spend a peaceful time
- Expand the circle of support system.
Codependence /Codependency = A Spiritual disease
Factors leading to Co-dependency:
- Lack of love and nurture
- Family addiction
- Physical, emotional and sexual abuse Mental or physical illness.
Recovery suggestions for Co-dependency:
- Stop living like a victim
- Trust yourself
- Feel your feelings
- Be compassionate yourself
- Be tormenting
- Stop self-doubt
- Stop reacting
- Detach emotionally
- Become self-responsible
- Prioritize needs and wants
- Exercise rights and choice
- Face reality
- Stop other dependence
- Set boundaries
- Practice communication
- Depend on yourself
- Depend on your
- God Live your life in recovery.
Characteristics of Co-dependency:
- Disconnected self
- Lack of trust
- Relationship problems
- Weak boundaries
- Sex problems
- Poor communication
- I am not enough
- Not loveable
- Do not feel
- Don’t self-care
- I feel not enjoy
- I am to blame
Co-dependency recovery principles:
- Behave differently
- Take self-responsibility
- Accept your co-dependency
When a person attempts to control some else’s life, it only reflects the lack of control they have on their own
By: Daniel Chidiac
Co-dependency è letting go of unhealthy relationships
Criteria of Co-dependents:
- Absence of self-relation
- Dependency on others
- Compulsive helping
- People pleasing
Co-dependency stands for:
- C = caring for
- O = others before yourself
- D = doesn’t give you strength
- E = even though you may feel
- P = powerful in order to be
- E = empowered you must step back
- N = nonchalantly allow yourself to
- D = delve into your wellbeing
- E = eventually feelings of peace will
- N = naturally surround you
- C = covering like a blanket for
- Y = you and those you love.
Tough love is the antidote for co-dependence
Co-dependent Relationships and Toxic Love:
- Development of self, the first priority
- Give opportunities for self and others to grow.
- Encouragement for each other’s progressive plans.
- Ready to adjust and negotiate, problem-solving together.
- Enhance each other’s individuality.
- Dealing your relation with full command over it and try to cope in most of the situations.
- Enjoy your own company
- The cycle of comfort.
- Toxic love:
- Insecurity leading to loneliness
- Excessive involvement
- Limited social life
- Fear from approval
- Jealousy, possessiveness, fear of competition
- Control over things, blaming, passive or aggressive manipulation
- Trying to change others under the influence of rigid behavior
- The relationship is not trustworthy
- Expectation; that one partner will handle everything and another one will not take part in it
- Fusion (being obsessed with each other’s problems and feelings)
- Unable to endure separation
- The cycle of pain and despair.
Love is not supposed to be teasing. There is nothing wrong in maintaining a relationship that will last forever but expecting it to last forever is what is dysfunctional.