A relationship in which a person is controlled by another, who is constantly promoting pathological conditions, it refers to the one who wants to command over other submissive people

By: Merriam Webster Dictionary

Co-dependence movement in Arizona in the mid-’80s. Co-Dependents Anonymous had its first meeting in October of 1986 and reading material on Co-dependence as a disease. These Co-dependence books were the next generation evolved from the books on the Adult Child Syndrome of the early ’80s.

In Clark & Stoffel’s 1992, research article entitled: “Assessment of Co-dependency Behavior in Two Health Student Groups”, they described: “A painful dependence which includes: compulsive behaviors, forceful approvals, destruction of self-worth and identity”.

An extreme control on others personal life, taking charge of others wellbeing will shatter the individuality of one person, it lowers the self-esteem, self-concept, and increases external locus of control. Codependent behaviors are self-destructive.

Decide what you are selfish or selfless

Do not get lost in the age of Me, Me, Me

Live—Lead–Love

According to Melody Beattie’s book Codependent No More (1986):

Codependency harms a person in many ways: disturbance of moods, emotions, feelings, thoughts, behaviors, it is a paradoxical dependency.

Scott Welzelt from Albert Einstein College of Medicine said that: “Codependent relationships signify a degree of unhealthy bonding, where one person doesn’t have self-efficacy or autonomy”.                                                                                                                

4 Keys:

  • Develop functional hobbies
  • Distance yourself
  • Spend a peaceful time
  • Expand the circle of support system.

Codependence /Codependency = A Spiritual disease

Factors leading to Co-dependency:

  • Lack of love and nurture
  • Rejection
  • Family addiction
  • Physical, emotional and sexual abuse Mental or physical illness.

Recovery suggestions for Co-dependency:

  • Stop living like a victim
  • Trust yourself
  • Feel your feelings
  • Be compassionate yourself
  • Be tormenting
  • Stop self-doubt
  • Stop reacting
  • Detach emotionally
  • Become self-responsible
  • Prioritize needs and wants
  • Exercise rights and choice
  • Face reality
  • Stop other dependence
  • Set boundaries
  • Practice communication
  • Depend on yourself
  • Depend on your
  • God Live your life in recovery.

Characteristics of Co-dependency:

  • Disconnected self
  • Denial
  • Obsession
  • Repression
  • Caretaking
  • Controlling
  • Lack of trust
  • Angry
  • Dependent
  • Relationship problems
  • Weak boundaries
  • Sex problems
  • Poor communication

Co-dependents beliefs:

  • I am not enough
  • Not loveable
  • Do not feel
  • Don’t self-care
  • I feel not enjoy
  • I am to blame

Co-dependency recovery principles:

  • Behave differently
  • Take self-responsibility
  • Accept your co-dependency

Co-dependent roles:

  • Scapegoat
  • Torment

When a person attempts to control some else’s life, it only reflects the lack of control they have on their own

By: Daniel Chidiac

 Co-dependency è letting go of unhealthy relationships

 Criteria of Co-dependents:

  • Absence of self-relation
  • Dependency on others
  • Compulsive helping
  • People pleasing

Co-dependency stands for:

  • C = caring for
  • O = others before yourself
  • D = doesn’t give you strength
  • E = even though you may feel
  • P = powerful in order to be
  • E = empowered you must step back
  • N = nonchalantly allow yourself to
  • D = delve into your wellbeing
  • E = eventually feelings of peace will
  • N = naturally surround you
  • C = covering like a blanket for
  • Y = you and those you love.

Tough love is the antidote for co-dependence

Co-dependent Relationships and Toxic Love:

  1. Love:
  • Development of self, the first priority
  • Give opportunities for self and others to grow.
  • Encouragement for each other’s progressive plans.
  • Ready to adjust and negotiate, problem-solving together.
  • Enhance each other’s individuality.
  • Dealing your relation with full command over it and try to cope in most of the situations.
  • Enjoy your own company
  • The cycle of comfort.
  1. Toxic love:
  • Insecurity leading to loneliness
  • Excessive involvement
  • Limited social life
  • Fear from approval
  • Jealousy, possessiveness, fear of competition
  • Control over things, blaming, passive or aggressive manipulation
  • Trying to change others under the influence of rigid behavior
  • The relationship is not trustworthy
  • Expectation; that one partner will handle everything and another one will not take part in it
  • Fusion (being obsessed with each other’s problems and feelings)
  • Unable to endure separation
  • The cycle of pain and despair.

Love is not supposed to be teasing. There is nothing wrong in maintaining a relationship that will last forever but expecting it to last forever is what is dysfunctional.