Anger, helplessness and confusion that we all face while handling certain situations, most of the time ends up making us annoyed as we are unable to communicate our feeling to the other end properly. We usually have no answer to this and things keep on going the same way. However the reality is totally different as where there is a will there is a way and hence there exist the answers to such situations. The need is to make some appropriate changes accordingly in your life. Changing oneself is no doubt a tough job but it’s not impossible and hence asks for developing a skill called assertiveness. Assertiveness in simple words is an alternative to personal powerlessness and manipulation. It asks for self-confidence as well as respect for others. The person who acts non-assertively usually responds after the opportunity has passed while the aggressive response usually results in generating negative impression that leads to regret later on. Assertiveness not only helps in handling issues amicably but it also helps in addressing the physical issues resulting from that like anxiety, depression, fatigues, headaches and many more.
Changing one self is an uphill struggle but it’s not unworkable. Millions of individuals have learned to put across themselves in a more effective way known to us as assertiveness. Many times we come across such situations where we necessitate some kind of survival tactics to counter, so to let others know that there is something wrong, keeping in consideration the dignity of everyone involved in the process. However, the reality is other way around where the individuals either swallow their feelings by being quiet and upset or they blast up to take revenge and to regain ascendancy.
The roots of assertiveness are based on following the egalitarianism as an approach. It’s not about getting ‘your way’ or ‘my way’ rather it says to follow the ‘right way’ .The main point to assert is to maintain the self-worth of the parties involved. Assertiveness is basically an alternative to personal subjection and manipulation. It helps develop self-assurance and reverence for others.
Assertiveness is not about building a good camouflage rather it’s about taking out that camouflage. If you look around, you will come across people who fear criticism and conflict and are strong believers that any criticism would squeeze them and in any conflict they will mislay. Such people are trained to believe that they have to follow the standards imposed by others. If you are one of those, then the assertiveness training is for you. This training will help develop an ability to stand up for yourself and do things on your own originality and hence increase your self worth.
In a nutshell,
“Assertiveness is the courage to be ourselves and show the world our likes and dislikes, our thoughts, feelings, and shortcomings. It’s about communicating honestly with family, friends and colleagues. As we become more assertive, we drop the mask and show our true selves. We proclaim: This is who I am, this is what I feel, and these are my needs – Anonymous”